“These are my selves, whose fragrance fills these rooms . . . “
She leans into her needlework and sees
Assisi rising in the silken strands,
her body like a question mark, at ease,
as though she wove her answers with her hands.
Then, with a thought, she rises into flight,
leaving the air quivering behind her,
so one might guess that she were made of light,
dancing around a memory’s whisper.
She comes back nonchalant, with a bouquet
of nothing but a smile, and youthful blooms
she places in a vase—as if to say,
These are my selves, whose fragrance fills these rooms.
And then her slender fingers weave, and know
the years between us, gathered like the snow.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
a repost it’s so good:
all along the headbangers’ wall
rabbis tickled young weanies
the little snippers came and went
and organless servants too
nearby with the diseased and deceiving
a pussywitz did spit
exalted black hats were approaching
the dogs they began to howl
no reason to get excited
the thief he writes the laws
there are many here among us
who feel the west is but a joke
you and i we know it’s true
they openly talk falsely now
but the hour is not too late
one among the many stands brave
syria fights for our fate.
5 dancing shlomos has not been allowed to teach anywhere. his poems and prose have been deleted from the best of blogs. his dramas appear mainly in county jails. he plays the lead actor. his novels include whatever he can plagiarize. 5ds follows the birthright jew and dylan-einstein rules.
judging by poem that neither einstein nor zimmerman would ever surpass, the jails house the best and most creative minds of the noahide nation.
my kingdom (and 600 of my finest boys, 60 best girls and 6 favorite transvestites) for a bit of 5 ds’s karma! cries baron lord $$$ count rothschild.
may this year of 2013 see the conversion of whining wall to a bunch of brick shithouses.
forgot:
dont contact 5ds. he is tracked by cyber snoops.
Gary, brilliant poem. Brought tears to my eyes. But hey, what does the title mean…?
Thank you for your comment, Berenice.
The actual title of the poem is “The Space Between 50 and 20.” (I hope that will be corrected!)
Imagine a man of 50 struck by the beauty, innocence of a young woman of 20. She is an artist who is trying to capture the ineffable in her work. His admiration is tempered by the space between them–the years he has lived and she has yet to live.
Unfortunately, the revised (or original) title of this poem doesn’t make the subject matter of the poem any clearer. The title, “The Space Between 50 and 20″, is a title that is equally unclear as the title “Between 50 and 20″.
However, let’s not quibble. It’s the poem that matters. Not the deliberately obscurantist title that will leave most readers baffled.
A sad comment, Sardonicus, and unworthy of a man of your stellar intellect. Does the title of a consummate work of art need to have a meaning?
I don’t think so.
The first time I saw a book with the obscure title “Hamlet”, aged 9, I thought it was about a small ham. When I got to 10 and had improved my vocabulary, I thought it was about a small village. Finally, at the age of 11, I discovered to my chagrin that it was all about a mad guy from Denmark who kept bursting into boring soliloquies like “To be or not to be, that is the question.”
An acute disapointment, I must say.
But now you are older, and know better, Xanadu.
I have to agree with Sardonicus. Fifty(50) and twenty(20) are the very same numbers for a nine year-old as for a ninety year-old. “Hamlet” can multiply in meaning.
To be or not to be?
So, would Hamlet (Shakespeare) choose not to be?
I’d have to laugh and say no he would not choose or strive or wish to become zero, a nonperson. Part of a void never having to suffer and know.
If he did choose not to be, like the impersonalists, we would all be less “Whether ’tis nobler,”
and all the rest..
Nor can you have it both ways.
Hmmm . . . I’m not so sure about that Homer. I read somewhere that the literal meaning of nibbana /nirvana is “extinguishedness”, the state of being snuffed out like a candle.
Not all religious teachers would assert that nirvana meant “the bliss of pure consciousness”, or the loss of individual consciousness by merging in Cosmic Consciousness … often compared to the water drop becoming one with the Ocean.
Some religious teachers would surely claim that the most desirable state to achieve is complete escape from the Wheel of Birth and that
NIRVANA = ANNIHILATION/EXTINCTION/NON-BEING
My knowledge of these matters is admittedly superficial. Apologies for rabbiting on. To think that Jean-Paul Sartre wrote a massive tome on this subject! (“Being and Non-Being”).
Not so sure won’t cut it in the court of the demon King.
Still, even he can’t squeeze nothing from nothing. Neither will he ever.
His Superior can.
What the Hell. I do admit to having only the smallest qualm as to stabbing Sartre in the back (or the front).
DIALECTIC SPIRITUALISM
A VEDIC VIEW OF WESTERN PHILOSOPHY
Jean-Paul Sartre
http://prabhupada.org.uk/dialectic/sartre1.htm
Not to detract from Gary’s poem which I kinda liked for its roundabout honesty. Not being a fan of poetry, like most things, I felt it as a bit pathetic and sad.
Also I don’t mind at all if 6 turns out to be 9.
mr. corseri, please fix up the title.
it should be 50 year old guy with 20 years to go vs. 20 year old girl with 50 years to go
Hardly worth writing the poem, lobro, if he gave it all away in the title.
Apart from which, I strongly object to numbers (50/20) in titles. Especially in poems. This tends to reduce poetry to mathematics. It is an affront to the Muse.
to state that one form of thought is reduced to another implies an objective ranking system, which furthermore implies a notion of distance as well as an absolute point of reference.
thus, one may say that talmud is the absolute zero, mathematics is 22.4, poetry 133, gastronomy 185, cartoons 227 and so on and distance is calculated by subtracting the rankings, e.g., poetry – mathematics=110.6.
(note that some basic arithmetic ability is required to use this system, whereas no poetic gift is necessary for its functioning).
the question is on what grounds to metricize the system.
Come to think of it, titles are about the most difficult part of any piece! A poet is moved to write, rather than label. So is a novelist – but the work is so long it finally produces a title. Or so I’ve been told….
Some years ago, it occurred to me that Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata was a keyboard simplicity – almost as easy as Chopsticks. The beauty is in the TOUCH. The beauty is further enhanced by learning of the composer’s love for his student – for whom he allegedly wrote the piece. Bring all of that together, and it is an extraordinarily gorgeous composition. Simple, with a simple title.
gilbert, i couldn’t agree more emphaticaly on both counts, i.e., that choice of title may be harder than writing a poem itself (cannot speak from experience) and that moonlight sonata is fiendishly difficult to execute properly.
there are many famous concert pianists that completely miss the point, in my opinion, despite their technical virtuosity.
aside from the fact that the classical music spanning the period from rennaisance to romantic is a happy marriage of poetry and mathematics, if you were to say that beethoven piano sonatas represent the highest reach of human thought, again i would find nothing to disagree with.
if someone quibbled at the omission of bach, schumann or schubert, i would likewise conceed them an arguable point.
You forgot to mention Mahler. Typical anti-Semite! You exclude the greatest composer who ever lived.
he practically worshipped richard wagner.
therefore, you admit that wagner was the greatest composer who ever lived and by extension that hitler was right.
so how about telling us that roy lichtenstein was the greatest visual artist who ever lived and not someone like leonardo, bernini, caravaggio, michelangelo (or as you well know, my favorite, adolph hitler)?
Whenever I hear or think of Schubert, I feel a little jiggy, I admit.
My God! I never thought the title of this little sonnet would take up so much space–(between or otherwise!).
Titles can be important as guideposts. They can also–intentionally or otherwise–mislead. (“Moby Dick” comes to mind. It’s not really the whale’s story–it’s about Ahab’s obsessions and Ishmael’s revelations. And not a few critics have said it’s about good vs evil, or man vs. the elements, or man vs. God [or Satan]).
I like what Gilbert has written above: “The beauty is in the TOUCH.”
And, I like what Emily Dickinson wrote: “Tell all the truth/ but tell it slant.”
Literalism has its place… and one seeks precision in mathematics and the sciences… but, in the Arts, a bit of indirection may be the shortest route to understanding.
For the dissenters, perhaps I should change the title to “?”?
But… I think not. …
Pay no attention to Sardonicus. His name is enough to reveal his true intent. I mistrust him as a man as well as a critic. Lobro’s comments are also decidedly strange. He is a man whose opinions must be regarded with utmost suspicion. As for hp and Gilbert Huntley, the less said about these trolls the better. This is an odd site. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn it is run from Tel Aviv.
to be on the safe side, best remain with brenda-T and zak (whom T clearly T-rusts implicitly by never mentionig him as a potential T-roll).
i am crestfallen, indeed devastated, it is a total trollocaust.
i wanna be like zak, not like these shady criminals, sardonicus and huntly.
how can i escape from tel aviv, no country wants me, what a bunch of antisemites.
zak, will you vouch for me, i cannot bear to be outside brendat’s circle of friends?
forgot to mention hp, i suspect he is a double agent anyway.
in fact, not double but multiple, in symmetric sense, happy to backstab everyone, incuding lord rama that he pretends so transparently to respect.
well, brenda-t, stay safe tonight, tie your diapers in a tight knot lest mossadists figure out how to work it to their advantage while you sleep the sleep of the righteous.
Brenda T has posted here before. And on the Ugly Truth site. She’a a Jew passing herself off as a gentile. She’s also a frustrated lesbian who has hit on me several times in the past, but I have always rejected her advances. I have good reasons for my cold attitude, but these remain strictly personal.
Better to be killed by Rama than Ravanna.
ruth,
i am gratified that you haven’t called me a frustrated lesbian, but paradoxically, you are one of the few posters here in whose character i have complete confidence.
yours truly malfunctioning antisemite
ps. must take my jewdar in for overhaul …
lobro, there are errors in your calculations.
Proving the fact of there is more in vino than veritus. There is also nonsense aplenty.
One such glaring example being your curious concern for Lord Rama, Who to you is – ?
ps. must take my jewdar in for overhaul …
Be careful, I could be a crypto-gentile. How would you ever know? Maybe your jewdar is working.
like any medical screening procedure, jewdar has 4 states: true-positive, false-positive, true-negative and false-negative.
the trick is to maximize “trues” or equivalently, to minimize “falses”.
the amateur antisemites are all too ready to accuse everyone of being a jew, thereby suffering from intolerable level of false-positive readings … whereas i am a pro
as your example proves.
for example, it is easy to capture all jews in the dragnet by declaring everyone on earth (except the jewdar owner) to be a jew, but how useful is it, in fact the hasbarites make capital use of this mistake.
btw, it doesn’t matter whether you are a crypto-goy (what is hebrew for “cow”?) or the mythical good jew, so long as jewdar declares you judenfrei (as opposed to judenfrau).
Hmmm… I’m not so sure if I pass your jewdar test. If I’m a “crypto-goy”, don’t you think my name is well chosen? It’s enough to sneak me in under most people’s jewdar, nein?
BTW, I threw in that “nein” to make me pass the “Germandar test”. Most people will now think I’m a German Jew. (With any luck).
an ideal jewdar is the one that picks out jews but screens out the 0.0001% of good ones.
your name is not just well chosen, but in fact chosen.
however, my jewdar kicks you out because you fail to qualify as that 99.9999% of real jews.
whether you a goy or one of the world’s 15 good jews is immaterial to ideal jewdar, so long as you don’t trip the “achtung! achtung! un jude underneath the lot” alarm.
As for hp and Gilbert Huntley, the less said about these trolls the better. This is an odd site. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn it is run from Tel Aviv.
say-no-mour, brenda-T … or do i hear echoes of an ex-poster, tragically missed karen-T?
Lord Vishnu also makes His appearance in Moby Dick.
To me this alone wonderfully veries Melville’s trancendentalist touches.
Oh boy! My first! I have never been called a “troll” before. I have ARRIVED! I didn’t even have to be impolite to do it. I am a talented troll, indeed!
To go ahead and critique the poem (sans title), it is far better and more touching than at first. Once the title is understood, it rings so true. Women/girls are so much sweeter before they have been jaded. It is evident the poet thinks so, too. (When they get jaded, after forty or so, they begin to act like Brenda T.)
I’m not even sure this is legal.
Nonetheless, – My Belated Life’s Belation.
Standing so slightly loosely warm,
as the the July sky’s breath adorns her straw profile,
lustrous copper brow,
and touches her cheek, a trickle,
a scent to grow and grow,
embrace forever and a smile
This Antonio!
This Casio!!
This Baudelaire!!!
Ever more woe, it seems..
As if life is a sport,
of a better sort of illusion
of a better sort.
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