OLTRE L’OSCURARSI DELLA RIVA [*Translation*]

Beyond This Darkening Shore, by XANADU

Tradotto in Italiano
da GIAN FRNCO SPOTTI

OLTRE L’OSCURARSI DELLA RIVA


Non ci sarà un ultimo sguardo, detto mi fu;
Ne saranno molti di più,
Di un mondo nuovo nella luce viva
Oltre l’oscurarsi della riva.

Aspettalo, oh aspetta! – arriverà
Come un tuono lontan si udirà
Come di un lontano tambur il fragor
Che si avvicina a dove tu sei or.

Quei dolci occhi vedrai ancor,
Gemme di luce delicate;
E la fine sarà di ogni dolor
Quando della notte le or saran passate.

Presto, presto, ah presto sarà stato! –
Mio amato perduto e andato! –
Nuova vita, nuovo amor, nuovo sol, nuovo mar,
Quando questo oscuro dì sarà passato.


14 thoughts to “OLTRE L’OSCURARSI DELLA RIVA [*Translation*]”

  1. Please try to post the original English versions of these poems so we who do not read Italian can understand.

    1. Gilbert,

      The English versions have already been published.
      Click on the LINK at the TOP of the Italian translation
      where it says: “Beyond this Darkening Shore”, by XANADU.

        1. @ The Realist

          The original poem is linked at the top of the Italian translation, But you are welcome to comment here in English. Gian Franco speaks English fluently and would welcome intelligent feedback on the art of translation. He is himself an accomplished poet, as you can see here:

          https://www.darkmoon.me/2020/far-away-and-long-ago-short-love-poems-in-memory-of-luisa/

          Treat him with respect and kindness, however, as you would hope to be treated yourself in similar circumstances.

      1. Thank you. Sister. (I’m not very computer savvy, or I would have noticed.)
        I LIKE the poem! It offers some positive over the negative of passing on – which is what we all need, the nearer to the Dark Side we venture.

      1. It’s not necessary to do what you suggest.

        The original poem in English is linked at the top of the page.
        Just click on the link and you have the original poem!

        (Unless of course you prefer a robot translation in execrable English).

  2. I think you’ll find that comments are supposed to be TYPED in and NOT sent by mail… at least that’s my understanding.

  3. @ Gian Franco

    Presto, presto, ah presto sarà stato! –
    Mio amato perduto e andato! –
    Nuova vita, nuovo amor, nuovo sol, nuovo mar,
    Quando questo oscuro dì sarà passato.

    È bellissimo. Ben fatto! Vedete, ora avete catturato la musica del poema originale usando rima e metro.Continuate così!

    1. Hi Saki,
      thank you very much. As usual you’re very kind and I appreciate it a lot. I will try to go on this way. I cannot promise it will be always like that because it much depends on the poem structure.
      Gian Franco

  4. I hope my rusty Italian is correct. Anyway, you will get the general idea.
    You have captured the music of the original by trying your hand at rhyme and metre. You couldn’t have done this by using prose or free verse.

    As has been pointed out more than once on this site, “Free verse is like playing tennis without the net.”

    But at least free verse or prose is always linguistically accurate. Here you have achieved both: linguistic accuracy as well as melodic euphony.

  5. Beautifully translated, Gian.

    As Saki has pointed out, it’s because you’ve made an extra effort to imitate the rhythms and musical sound effects of the original poem.

    You have been able to do this, especially in the last verse quoted above by Saki, because many of LD’s later poems are written in such basic and easily comprehensible English that mistranslation can easily be avoided. She tries her best, in her more recent poems, to avoid all obscurity and ambiguity.

    After all, what could be less obscure and less ambiguous than the last verse of this poem in English?

    LD:

    Soon, soon, ah soon let it be!—
    My lovely lost and gone!—
    New life, new love, new sun, new sea,
    When this dark day is done.

    GFS:

    Presto, presto, ah presto sarà stato! –
    Mio amato perduto e andato! –
    Nuova vita, nuovo amor, nuovo sol, nuovo mar,
    Quando questo oscuro dì sarà passato.

    Translating this into ANY language ought to be easy, even in rhyme and metre; which is usually much harder to do with linguistic accuracy.

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